love vs arrange marriage

Love Marriage vs Arranged Marriage is a universal topic. The discussion just never ends while comparing these. Because everybody has a different opinion and perspective while comparing it.

Whenever we want to convey ourselves or to someone else, it is the most debatable topic when it comes to love marriage vs arranged marriage. The key to a happy and successful marriage is 50% love with 50% adjustment. Both have their own advantages and disadvantages. So whatever sails your boat just go for it. Here are a few things, in my opinion, to keep in mind while considering whether you want to love marriage vs arranged marriage.

Arranged Marriage Advantages

arrange marriage
  • In an arranged marriage, how your partner turns out in the future is not fully your responsibility. Nobody can blame you in future because your family has chosen them.
  • Good level of understanding between both the families or probably equal in arranged marriages as compared in love marriages.
  • You both will hard with each other intentionally on every note because you both don’t want to disappoint your families in an arranged marriage.
  • You are new in every aspect so you will see another person as they are and try to adjust and learn them like a kid.
  • Good atmosphere in the family always. This is better for your future also. Not like in love marriage where always someone is present to oppose.
  • If something goes wrong, your partner’s family will also support you.
  • Many people don’t tell in love marriage if their partner is cheating or if any health issue is there, because of shame. But not in arrange marriage, here you both are new so you can bombard them with every sensible clearly without any confusion.
  • Both will try to present themselves perfectly all times.
  • 90% of foreign marriages are love marriages but divorced. In India 90% are arranged marriages but still together.

Arranged Marriage Disadvantages

  • Partner is chosen by the family, no control to choose.
  • In arranged marriage compatibility is decided by parents or other persons involved. It’s you who should be choosing it.
  • Love is your second priority. First one will be your family always.
  • Family interference will always be there because they are the ones who make you met.
  • Expectations of both partners not defined clearly in an arranged marriage. You don’t know what, why and how of each other.
  • If not satisfied one ends up living with a total stranger lifetime.
  • Communication gap to some levels will always be present. It’s because the time spent together is very less.
  • The relation takes years to bloom completely.
  • Lovemaking or doing every necessary step is mandatory. You are doing it without love due to situations.
  • Divorce rate high in an arranged marriage.
  • Financial loopholes, if not known properly another family may fool you.
  • It feels like a dehumanizing process where the partner is chosen on various filters like color, beauty, weight, height, etc. Physical aspects are more important than feelings.

Love Marriage Advantages

  • First, understand each other than important decisions. Behavior, attitude, mindset, education, financial status, family and maturity.
  • In a personal fight, the family does not involve unless you made them. You know your partner nature. So you know when you should be angry or calm.
  • Good understanding, you both will enjoy it is not mandatory.
  • In love marriage, you both will think and act like a team from day one.
  • Plan everything help and work with each other to achieve your goals.
  • Complete freedom, you both know weak and positive points of each other.
  • The hope of together forever is already there with mutual respect.
  • You know the past so no confusion element present for future.
  • Eradicate social evil like dowry. Mutual consent is present for all decisions.
  • Independent to take decisions at own level.
  • You can be your crazy self with each other.
  • You can say and admit whatever you want without any secrets or ego.
  • In love marriage, both of you both may not be perfect but True to heart. You are not filtered on many things like in arranged marriages.
  • According to me if something goes wrong in the future then “Better to be the king of losing team than to be the pawn of winning team”.

Love Marriage Disadvantages

  • We don’t care about family, relatives, etc.
  • Leaving imprints on society and family which takes a very long time to fade.
  • Later you may realize that love is not the only thing. Money, family and other factors also matter to some extent.
  • In love, you don’t ask due to doubt that they will become angry. They will think you are not serious.
  • Sometimes in love you do stupid things like age is no bar or some money-minded people marry for alimony in the future.
  • If wrong, love ends in 5 years in love marriages.

Conclusion

Love marriage is not important but “Love in marriage is”. Don’t judge on an opinion by others, just stand for yourself. Here are the necessary things which you should look for :

  • Respect, care, and understanding.
  • Mutual consent (Physical, Mental, Social)
  • Treat as a family.
  • Comfortable with each other.
  • Never want to leave.

When you find these things don’t even think twice comparing Love marriage vs Arranged marriage.

50 years together married